The day comes and you catch a plane straight to Paris. You hire a car, and you drive for about 5 hours in a big circle until your parents admit they're lost. "You stupid whore" says your dad "What do you mean you didn't you realise that when I said bring a map, I meant a map of France!" "Yeah, well fuck you" Answers your mum.

Just then you see a French man with a stripy tee shirt riding a bike with a string of garlic and onions around his neck. You decide to ask him for directions. You call him over, but he appears not to know any English apart from "Do you want to buy some onions monsieur".

Do you: