Saturday 22nd April 2000
Lee reports on the sudden incapacity of Dak and Ebony


I heard the groans from the nest compartment as I descended the stairs that fateful day just the other week, when the sun poked its nose through the thick velvety curtains and...(Editor's note: less of the poetry, huh?)...okay, okay. I was just trying to create some ambience.

Dak was ill - or, should I rather say, incapacitated. He held his paws for me to look at and whined pitifully:

'They're so, so sore. Can't you do something about it?'

I looked at the fur and shrugged my shoulders - 'I think you've been typing too much, Dak, I really do. How often are you using that laptop?'

Dak thought for a moment and confessed 'I'm on it most hours. There's so many bits of articles to do now we're short staffed and we have to make the deadlines each week'

I could immediately see what it was without having to subject them to a full blown medical examination. Dak and Ebony were sure, too.

'RSA?' Dak asked 'Is it what I think it is?'

'RSA?' I questioned 'What does that stand for?'

'Repetitive Strain Injury' Dak assured me 'I read about it in a book once. Apparently a lot of computer operators and manual labourers get it when they can't take frequent rests in their employment'

I looked at him with disbelief. Surely the initials should be RSI! Perhaps I'd best go and look up the correct spelling of that last word, I was sure that it was spelt with an 'i'

'Where did you learn about it?' I asked.

'Oh - in the DHI magazine. It was a main...'

'DHI?' I interrupted 'What does that stand for?'

Dak looked at me in disbelief 'You haven't heard of them?'

I shook my head 'No - can't say I have'

'Okay. Stands for the "Dyslexic Hamster Association". Ebony and I are chair hamsters for the Group. Needed some figurehead or something so we volunteered'

I couldn't help remarking to myself that, perhaps, they should be patients rather than patrons but I held my peace and bid Dak continue. Actually, he'd lost his train of thought and fell silent.

'What you'll need to do is rest' I told him 'Yes, I know! You've got articles to write, correspondence to answer, people to interview. Dak, listen! You and Ebony have got to take a long break and slow it down or you may never be able to write again! You hear me?'

There was a pause and a sigh 'Guess so...'

I turned to go but Dak called me back.

'That mean we can go away somewhere?' he squeaked.

'If you want...' and there was a frantic scurrying in the nest compartment as the entire food contents were crammed into the cheek pouches. Dak emerged with a loud squeak announcing to Ebony 'Great! Hey, comrade! Let's go visit some friends in Washington!'

And, with that, they disappeared out the door and off to the nearest airport.

Editor's note: Dak and Ebony have been pillars at the Rodent Weekly and it is unfortunate - but necessary - that they take this break. We shall of course continue to publish the Weekly while they're recuperating but this web page will have to take a few weeks off from publication until they return. I hope you understand.

Lee the human doesn't write at all for the Rodent Weekly.
This article appears courtesy of that paper.




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